Thursday, August 21, 2008

Ever Wonder Why...?

It's been a while since we had a little silliness, don't you think? And if anyone is capable of bringing you a little silliness, it's your friend the Hermit! So if you are ready, ask yourself the question...

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are going dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

Now that we have had a little dose of silly...why don't we go get some fresh coffee? See, there's that word again!

11 comments:

Cat Melton said...

As usual, my friend, I can come here and just ENJOY...

The string and the vacuum cleaner is the one that tickled me most today...so true, and such a picture it must be of a foolish woman (yes, me)doing exactly that!

And I hadn't realized that you fellas had been slighted all these years...no father-in-law jokes...we'll have to see about remedying that...lol

I hope you have as wonderful a day as you've made for me, Jim!

Yes, I'm smilin',
Cat

blondie said...

And how many Brunette Jokes or Red Head Jokes to you hear?
BUT NOOOOOOOO
It's always got to be the Blonde that gets picked on :(
hehehe
Thanks for the coffee Jim,
Enjoyed the sillyness a lot!
blondie :))

Anonymous said...

I was thinking about you this morning and made up my mind to tell you how proud I am of you. Who else could write about a beat up old office chair ( yes, folks, it is ragged ) and make it so enjoyable and personable? As usual, when I read your blog today I was happy all over!
Keep up the good work. I love you lots.
Big Sis
P.S. the world is missing out on sooo much. Why don't you publish?

HermitJim said...

Hey Cat...isn't it strange how nearly all of us have done something like that? We just never think how it would look if someone were watching . Glad I could make you smaile this morning...

Hey Blondie...I'll have to dig around and see if I can find some red-head jokes just for you! Glad you enjoyed the little bit of silliness...sometimes we all need a slight taste of it, especially those of us that work at home.So happy to see you here so early in the morning...

Hey Sis...thanks for all the kind words this morning. I'm glad you enjoyed the bit about my old chair...having seen it first hand you know how true it all was. I'm still working on a small book to self publish...maybe it will be ready for Christmas, but who knows?

Ladies...I thank you so much for taking the time to come by and comment. I really and truly appreciate it...a LOT!

See ya in the funny papers!

Jim

Anonymous said...

Morning Jim & everyone - sorry didn't make it here early like you others but I sure enjoyed the blog & could relate to all the comments. The first point in the blog about the mouse - well I have this "no strings attached mouse" - and don't you think it loses juice right in the middle of something -
so matter how much I press on it - wiggle the batteries - it has disappeared. No one told me that I needed a back-up mouse. So one time I felt like throwing it very far away or soaking it in the dishwater.
We are having nice cool weather here - getting instantly ready for fall - it is 12 C down from the 33 a few days ago. No I am not wearing my winter jacket - but definately bundling up.
Have a good day all. And don't forget to giggle (even at yourself) - it helps brighten the day.

Manu said...

Hi Jim...i know i am way to late for morning coffee but i still wanted to let you know that i truly enjoyed your dose of silliness. It was very refreshing to have a good reason to smile after all this painting i have behind me.;o)
Thank you and have a silly, smily day.

HermitJim said...

Hey Myrna...cool weather this time of year seems so strange to me. It won't get cool here until probably late October if then. Thanks for dropping by and for the comments.

Hey Manu...always glad to make someone smile a bit. That just makes my day. Bet you'll be glad when the painting is all done, huh?

You ladies have a really good day and thanks again...

Jim

js said...

Hey Jim. Very hilarious.

"Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?"

Because there is no Oxygen?

js

js said...

Hey Jim. Very hilarious.

"Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?"

Because there is no Oxygen?

js

js said...

Hey Jim. Very hilarious.

"Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?"

Because there is no Oxygen?

js

HermitJim said...

Hey John...thanks for stopping by. It seems like there would be oxygen allowed into the bottle after the lid was removed the first time. But I don't even pretend to know the true answer...gonna take someone smarter than me.

See ya...
Jim