Thursday, August 25, 2011

A Little Help From Jeff...!


I know most of you can remember Jeff Foxworthy's list of "You might be a Redneck", right?

Well, he has another one that I just found. This one may have been around for a while, but I haven't seen it before. Anyway, I thought it was funny enough to share with you all, just in case you have had enough of earthquakes, floods, hurricanes, and drought!

Well, at least we aren't rednecks

Published: Tuesday, August 23, 2011, 5:00 AM
By The Oregonian

Comedian Jeff Foxworthy's latest: A "Then You Live in Oregon" list. And help us out a bit: Add "you live in Oregon" at the end of each:

If someone in a Home Depot offers you assistance and they don't work there ...

If you've worn shorts, sandals and a parka at the same time ...

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong number ...

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once ...

If you have switched from "heat" to "A/C" and back again in the same day ...

If you install security lights on your house and garage but leave both doors unlocked ...

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over two layers of clothes or under a raincoat ...

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction ...

If you feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash ...

If you know more than 10 ways to order coffee ...

If you stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the "Walk" signal ...

If you consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain ...

If you know the difference between chinook, coho and sockeye salmon ...

If you know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup , Clatskanie, Issaquah, Oregon, Umpqua, Yakima and Willamette ...

If you know that Boring is a city and not just a feeling ...

If you can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food ...

If you never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho ...

If you have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain ...

Well, that's all I had. Just wanted to throw something a bit different at you for a change! I know we all get tired of the same old thing...at least I do!

Want some fresh coffee? I've got some strawberry cake to go with it!
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13 comments:

  1. 2 TrampsAugust 25, 2011 at 12:29 AM

    Okay - I live in Oregon!! Now how about two pieces of that cake - the strawberries probably came from here...

    ReplyDelete
  2. HermitJimAugust 25, 2011 at 12:37 AM

    Hey 2 Tramps...
    Sorry about that! (grin)

    Two pieces of the cake coming up! I hope I didn't offend! All in the name of fun, ya know?

    Many thanks for coming by today!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Gorges SmytheAugust 25, 2011 at 2:15 AM

    Same deer?

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousAugust 25, 2011 at 3:00 AM

    Very interesting points. Thanks!

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    ReplyDelete
  5. chinasyndromeAugust 25, 2011 at 5:19 AM

    Funny yet makes Oregon sound like a good place to live!

    China
    III

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ben in TexasAugust 25, 2011 at 5:30 AM

    Ok, GOT to forward that to my Daughter who lives in Hood River OR.. How the hell she got there from Texas ,I'll never know.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Andolphus GreyAugust 25, 2011 at 6:41 AM

    I heard a similar list for NH. Halloween costumes definitely have to fit over a snowsuit.

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  8. SHARONAugust 25, 2011 at 8:19 AM

    Just send me a piece of the strawberry cake. I'll make my own coffee, although it probably won't be as good as yours.

    ReplyDelete
  9. JoJoAugust 25, 2011 at 8:52 AM

    That was great. Yes its refreshing to hear something fun instead of all the ugly sad stuff going on.
    Do you have cool whip to go with that cake. :D

    ReplyDelete
  10. HermitJimAugust 25, 2011 at 9:08 AM

    Hey Gorges...
    Good question! I didn't see it in the article!

    Thanks for coming over this morning!


    Hey Anon 3:00...
    Thanks for coming by today!


    Hey China...
    They do have some beautiful country there! Hope they have a sense of humor as well!

    Thanks, buddy, for coming by today!


    Hey Ben...
    I do hope she'll get a bang out of it!

    Must have been a heck of a wrong turn for her to wind up in Oregon!

    I appreciate your coming by this morning!


    Hey Sixbears...
    The weather is pretty similar, I guess! Too cold for me!

    Thanks, my friend, for the visit today!


    Hey Sharon...
    Cake coming up! What...you don't like my coffee?

    Now my feelings are hurt! I mean, just 'cause you can float a spoon in it...

    Hey, thanks for dropping in today!


    Hey JoJo...
    You are just like Mom! She likes cool whip on nearly everything!

    I'll borrow some from her, just for you!

    Thanks, sweetie, for coming over this morning!

    ReplyDelete
  11. TROUBLEnTXAugust 25, 2011 at 12:35 PM

    Cool whip's ok, but,,,ice cream's better. yummm

    ReplyDelete
  12. PhilAugust 26, 2011 at 2:24 PM

    OK Ben, I am currently just down the road from your daughter, in The Dalles.
    This list is only applicable to Western Oregon, where I grew up.
    Most folks don't understand that the majority of Oregon is actually High desert.

    Western Oregon is indeed, one wet place to live and also very beautiful.

    Thanks for the funny Jim.

    ReplyDelete
  13. PhilAugust 26, 2011 at 2:25 PM

    By the way, I have actually been to Boring, Oregon.
    The name fits now that they closed the local strip joint.
    ;)

    ReplyDelete