As This Ever Happened To You...?

This morning I was sitting here drinking my coffee...and I got to thinking. Always a bad sign, don't you think?

Several things occurred to me about my past life, and I thought I might mention them here to see if anyone else has ever experienced the same.

All through my life, I have been talked at, talked about, talked down to, talked over, and talked around...but very few times has someone actually talked TO me!

For most of my life, my opinion has been demanded of me, given to me, subject to change for me, bribed for, ransomed for, offered to pay for, and misinterpreted or misunderstood...but seldom has anyone just simply and honestly ASKED for it!

I have been looked over, looked through, overlooked, looked in the direction of, looked at but not seen, looked at to size up..but very few times has anyone looked straight at me EYE TO EYE!

Often I have had my hand pawed, pumped up and down, drowned by a sweaty palm, engulfed limply, slapped both playfully and for real, symbolically shaken, and even almost raised...but only on a few happy occasions have I ever had my hand firmly shaken as a new or reunited FRIEND!

Far, far too often I have been pushed out of the way, pulled down, pushed aside, pushed down, pushed in the wrong direction, pushed to the edge, pushed to my limit....but only a few remembered times in my life, have I ever had anyone offer to help push me UP!

I have been picked on, picked last, not picked at all, picked over and even picked clean...but once in a great while, I have had the honor of being picked as a new acquaintance or maybe even an advisor!

Most of these actions hurt a little. Most are done without even thinking about it. Most are done by nearly all of us from time to time, either on purpose or by accident. No matter how they are done, the impression and the damage is always the same.

To make sure that I do the best that I can to avoid these negative actions as much as I can. For instance, if you (or I) are in a gathering, such as a party or meeting or group activity...take the time to look around you. Scan the crowd a little and carefully look at the faces.

You'll probably see at least one person, maybe standing with their back to the wall, not far from a doorway...that has a look on his or her face that can only be saying "What am I doing here?" When you find that one person, walk purposefully up to them, offer them your hand while looking them straight in the eye, give them a nice firm hand shake and say in all honesty "Hello, my name is (your name) and I'm really glad to see you!"

Most of the time you'll immediately see the lost look disappear and a smile replace it. You will have just made a possible outsider feel as though they are a participating member of a group, and you will quite possibly just have made a new friend! Best of all, deep down inside...you have the satisfaction of knowing you have done something positive FOR someone and not TO them.

Now, let's have another cup of coffee, my friend!

I'm Just Not Smart Enough...

This morning I ran down to the corner store to get some tobacco, and started talking to my friend that runs the place.

He started asking me if the banks were closed today. I told him yes, they were closed for the holiday. When he asked, I told him "Presidents Day". Then he asked about the post office...!

You know what? No matter how hard I tried to explain it to him, I found that whatever I started to say even sounded silly to me! I mean, here is a guy that is a naturalized citizen, trying to follow all the rules and laws of his adopted home, and he wants to show all his customers that he is enough of a patriot to want to do the acceptable thing by honoring past presidents.

But his customers want him to be open when they are off! His customers want him to be open early enough so they can stop by on the way to work, stay open late enough at night so that they can run down and pick up something they forgot to get at the grocery store, and most importantly, they want him to be open on ALL holidays, just in case they need something and the grocery store is closed!

You know how many days a year this particular store is closed? 2! That's right, he is only closed 2 days a year! One of them is Christmas! That's right, my friend, Here is a man, not born in this country, following a different religion than most of us, and yet he is respectful enough of our practices and our religion and our GOD...he celebrates His birth! A lot of "True Americans" won't even go to church on Christmas...much less on Sunday!

By the way, the other day that the store is closed? Believe it or not, it's the 4TH of July...Independence Day! Imagine...actually having the nerve to close on a day when so many of his customers are off work and need a fresh supply of beer, or picnic supplies, OR whatever!

Imagine someone taking the time to reflect on a day we chose to remember the most important day in our history! All because he knows that he wouldn't have the opportunities he has now, if that particular action had not been taken by our fore fathers!

As I kept trying to explain about the workings of holidays and why they are changed so often, and why we don't have parades and more public celebrations on days that should be of import to us...I found myself lacking! Very sad when I could not even explain to someone why we celebrate certain holidays in the manner that we do, when in all honesty, I just don't know!

Sure he charges more than the grocery store does...so what? If folks had been getting extra supplies like they should, they wouldn't have to pay more! Someone has to be open for us to satisfy our lack of planning, our lack of respect for important days in our history.

This man, and many more just like him, have done me a great service without even knowing it. He has taught me that I do NOT know what I should about how our government is supposed to work. I cannot explain the most fundamental things in an understandable fashion to a person who, by choice, came here from his homeland, learned to speak a second language, started a business to service the needs of his neighbors (knowing it's the most dangerous job in the United States) and ask all the right questions about laws, and holidays, and religion, and politics...why? Because he wants to understand! He really wants to know! He wants to make sure that he is well versed enough in these things to go home after a 14 hour work day, sit down with his kids, and explain it to them in a fashion that they will understand. Just so they don't ever have to ask some poor smuck like me to explain it!

This man has all my respect! I feel really bad, because he is asking all the right questions, and I can't give him the right answers...I'm just not smart enough!

Now, what do you say to a fresh cup of coffee...I need some to wash down that big dish of humble pie I just had!