Friday, June 6, 2008

Humor And Common Sense...!

Mark Twain was a genius when it came to saying things that needed saying, but doing so with a touch of humor. Most of all, he realised that we all need to have some humor in our lives. A smile is an important thing, especially if worn on the inside. I feel that a smile and a good dose of common sense can go a long way to keeping us all healthy. So, to aid in your health and well being, I wanted to start the day with a series of quotes from this great man and his common sense approach to life.

A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.

A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.

A man's character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation.

A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.

A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.

A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape.

Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.

Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper.

Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

All generalizations are false, including this one.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.

Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary.

Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today.

As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain from smoking when awake.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Be careless in your dress if you will, but keep a tidy soul.

Better a broken promise than none at all.

Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man. The biography of the man himself cannot be written.

But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?

Buy land, they're not making it anymore.

By trying we can easily endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

Civilization is the limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.

'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.

Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.

Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain.

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Don't let schooling interfere with your education.

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish.

Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.

Education consists mainly of what we have unlearned.

Everything has its limit - iron ore cannot be educated into gold.

Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.

Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.

Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.

Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.

Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.

George Washington, as a boy, was ignorant of the commonest accomplishments of youth. He could not even lie.

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Thank you to Mr. Samuel Clemens, better known as Mark Twain. Now let's get some fresh coffee!

4 comments:

Cat Melton said...

Ah, a wonderful start to a beautiful day...
Gotta love Mr. Clemens!

Thanks for helping me get started off right,

Cat

HermitJim said...

Hey Cat...thanks for dropping by this morning. I know that you recognise the importance of a smile, so here's hoping that we can keep smiling all day!

See ya, my friend!
Jim

Anonymous said...

Lots and lots of good quotes there.
Thanks for passing them on.

Nite now.

HermitJim said...

Hey Myrna...thanks for stopping by. I still love to read Mark Twain even though people now days would consider him a racist. I think he was and is one of the greatest humorest of his time, along with Will Rogers!

See ya
Jim