Saturday, August 13, 2011

Random Thoughts On Everything...!

Since it's Saturday, I thought I'd throw out a few random thoughts for your consideration!

Nothing too serious, since it is the weekend! Know what I mean? Might be something you can relate to!

Wise thoughts on everything

1. Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

2. Life is sexually transmitted.

3. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

4. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection make him a sandwich.

5. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

6. Some people are like Slinkies... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs...

7. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing...

8. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

9. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

10. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

11. In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

12. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

13. You read about all these Terrorists most of them came here legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10-15 years. Now, compare that to Blockbuster; you are two days late with a video and those people are all over you. I think we should put Blockbuster in charge of Immigration & Homeland Security.

Like I said, nothing too serious today. Just trying to have a little fun!

I'm going to have some coffee out on the patio. Want to join me?


Gorges Smythe said...

Nothing too serious? Those are the wisest words I've read for a while outside of the Bible!

Argentum Vulgaris said...

I've seen them before, always a good read. The last one was an addition, I'm going to steal that.

HJ, my blogs have changed, check for my new blog; Genes is a part of it. You'll see what happened when you get there.


Momlady said...

Do you know who said number 12? Ronald Reagan.

Ben in Texas said...

Yea, good ole rehash of some simple wise sayings.

Dizzy-Dick said...

Thank you for the laughs this morning. Always a good way to start a day.

JoJo said...

Fun post and I like the last one the best. I was heading out to the porch myself its a nice morning.

TROUBLEnTX said...

Loved em,,,keep em coming.

chinasyndrome said...

Funny yet most are true! Strange days Jim!