Monday, March 16, 2009

Want To Confuse People...?

When I was a young man still in high school, I had a friend named Biff.

Now Biff and I got into a lot of things together, but one of the favorite things we used to do was to practise our own brand of "Double talk". What is Double talk, you ask? Well, it's a lot like how the politicians talk!

Double talk is the art of taking simple phrases or sentences, and rephrasing them in such a way that they were almost impossible to understand. Like I said, it's a lot like talking like a politician!

Now if you are a parent, this can be a wonderful way to impress your children. It also helps to use this form of talking when fighting with your spouse, or when you want to confuse the in laws.

Anyway, I wanted to show you just how effective and easy this type of entertainment can be...you can start with this simple phrase.

"Never calculate too quickly on the possibility of juvenile incubation before the poultry is thoroughly materialized!" or , in other words, "Never count your chickens before they hatch".

See how easy that is? Now if you want to sound threatening and still talk like a politician...you can use this little bit of Double talk to do the job!

" If you continue to persist in this action, I shall be compelled to impel upon you you a terrific strain of blows, and you will succumb under my savage attack! Further more, I shall beat you bloodily, brutally, above and about the brow!"

Just keep saying this until you can say it very fast from memory, and I promise that everyone will think that you are surely a force to be reckoned with! But then, we already knew that, right?

Now, let's have another cup of coffee, my friend!

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think I deleted my comment
Good morning Hermit,
You have left my head spining with your Double talk lesson.hehehe
Now I really do need another cup.
Maybe this is why I am the first comment and possible the second as well
Have a great day my friend :)
JoJo

Pat Riot said...

Good Morning, In my family I grew up with all the adults speaking egg latin or pig latin. Just by listening I learned these too. My children here us talking and they have picked some of it up. This was very popular when my parents were young. It has died off mostly. To this day my mother can ask me a question in line at the store lets say and no one around us has a clue what was said. Of course as a kid it was used to talk about something so us kids would be in the dark.

Love the site. Mark

HermitJim said...

Hey JoJo...I only see one comment, so Iguess you are only the first...and not the first and second!

Take as much coffee as you need as I know it can be confusing to try and follow my convoluted ramblings.

Thanks so much for coming by...


Hey Mark...good to see you today. Funny how many of the little tricks and tips that we were taught as children stay with us.

Appreciate you coming by today!

Anonymous said...

Huh? Have I been out in the sun to long?
You have to much time on your hands today?
All in good fun Jim-Unique post to say the least

HermitJim said...

Hey Tony...well, you know how it is. Once in a while, you get off on some tamget for whatever reason or another!

Hey, I really appreciate you dropping by today!

Ontological Thinker said...

Yes, the whole listen to what I mean, and not what I say. I am still laughing at the last part.

HermitJim said...

Hey Thinker...it isn't what you say, but the manner in which you say it that makes the difference, I think.

Hey, I really am glad that you came by today!

Cygnus MacLlyr said...

I think I'm too intimidated to type...

Unknown said...

How well I remember Biff and the havoc y'all would wreak on those around..namely me!! Y'all had your own version of Shakespeare,too,as I recall. Another blog??

HermitJim said...

Hey Sis...may have to see if I can remember that one!