Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Please Remain Calm...!

Here is a little lesson for you all today!

I am passing this on to you because it definitely works and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives. By following simple advice I heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace.

Dr. Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you've started and never finished."

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off 23 Bud Lights, a bottle of Absolute, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos and a box of chocolates.

You have no idea how wonderfully good I feel. Please pass this on to those you feel might be in need of inner peace.

Now...how about we finish off this pot of coffee and make some fresh, my friend?

22 comments:

Phil said...

I ain't a doctor but my name is Phil and I would highly suggest you add enough whiskey to that list so you won't even think about coffee when you finally wake up.

Fuck DR. Phil.

TEAM HALL said...

Ohhhh Jim, you do make me giggle! I'm so glad I drop by here for coffee first thing!
You have a fabulous day!
Cath

wendigo said...

Damn, I love those breakfasts of champions!

Anonymous said...

You spelled inher piece wrong. Must be the Prozac

shinerbock said...

Great advice... but I think I have a little too much whiskey lying around. It would take me a couple solid weeks to drink it and I have a feeling I wouldn't be very productive. But hell, I suppose the fun is in trying.

scoutinlife said...

Lol Hermit, Reckon I will have to go home and see what I have left undone.... Have a great day!

Sarah said...

Oh! I definitely can see how adhering to your recipe can bring about inner peace (and perhaps some tummy troubles, but there is always a price to pay for true happiness, right?) Do you recommend this every morning? ;)

Anonymous said...

Thanks Hermit, now I feel guilty. I have a bunch of partially completed things that need to be finished. I WAS going to hang around the house and lay low, now I feel like I really need to get going thanks to you. Choices, choices. Need to take stuff to Goodwill, need to dehydrate some potatoes, need to finish that extra quilt, need to get some extra supplies, and well....

Aw, I might as well as gone to work.

Warrior (I forgot to log in)

Catman said...

OMG, Thanks Hermit!

You're a genius!

Mayberry said...

HA! "Dr." Phil is a moron. That's why we deported him to Hollywood....

Lydia said...

That's funny Jim! Well heck if I listen to Dr Phil I would never have inner peace.

But your idea just might work! I know there is always an almond joy hiding wayyyyy in the back of the fridge - and there's some bacardi and hmmm, now that might help.

Thanks for the good advice Jim~
lydia

Anonymous said...

Gawd! Can you still move after ingesting all that? I'd be lying on the floor, moaning!

Good post!

Dr. Phil is full of brown smelly stuff that came out of the back end of a bull, as usual. As a compulsive project finisher, I've been there, done that, and don't feel at peace. So much for pop psychology!

Cygnus MacLlyr said...

Can't type-- too busy lmao. When I finish rotf, I'd love the coffee, sir! Oh wait... no Absolute to doctor it. Hmm...

LOL!!!

Great smile, Uncle! cool work there!

Jess (Ozark Momma) said...

Ah Hermit...I spit hot cocoa on the screen, danke! Now, I think I'll dump the cocoa and 'finish' that bottle of wine that's in the fridge...only been open a day, but I do hate to leave things undone!!

Stephanie in AR said...

Hey hermit - I'll take the coffee esp if you bring some power crews with it! Thanks for worrying about us here in Arkansas. We still don't have power, I am at the fil's house. Will have some posts later on how the prep thing went. My old hometown where my daughter just moved into is just devestated. It looks like a tornado went through but left the houses standing. They likely won't get power for at least two more weeks. We might by this weekend. She's been trying to prep but her dh isn't totally on board. She heard him talking to his cousin after the storm went through and people could get out "I don't think anyone was prepared for this storm...except for H. & her mom..." Vindication!! Well we live in one of three hardest hit counties in Arkansas and prolly won't have power until at least this weekend. Save some coffee for me & feel free to send some warm weather my way.

HermitJim said...

I'll sure do just that, my friend! I'll even put a bit of Texas "anti-freeze" in it! Just a taste of that will thaw your pipes, for sure!

Seriously, I'm glad you all are ok...and my continuerd best wishes go out to you and yopur family.

Keep your chin up!

Bullseye said...

Now I can get into this big time Jim, thanks for the idea. Gonna feel so good soon,

HermitJim said...

Hey Busted...works for me, brother...

Hey Andy...glad you found it useful!

Hey Cath...always look forward to making you giggle! Keep on coming back!

Hey Windego...sometimes you just can't beat it, ya know?

Hey MyWay...yeah, it must be!Maybe it's out of date?

Hey Shinerbock...maybe I should come and give ya a hand...!

Hey Scout...after you finish up what's around the house, you have a great day as well! BTW, don't accidently shoot the dog!

Hey Sarah...don't think I'd do this every day, but you are right in that there is always a price to pay...BIG TIME!!

Hey Warrior...just have a few more cups of fortified coffee...and it won't look so bad! Trust me!

Hey Catman...I been telling folks that same thing for years...glad to see you agree!

Hey Mayberry...that's just where he belongs...

Hey Lydia...I KNEW that you had one of those hidden! Go ahead and finish it, I won't tell!

Hey Anon...I think tomorrow is when I will pay the price!!

Hey Cygnus...thanks, my man! Still got some coffee, but no chaser!

Hey Momma...sorry about the screen. But after the rest of the wine...it won't matter!

Hey Bullseye...nice to find something that we can all participate in as a group, don't you think? Now, pass that bottle you brought!

HermitJim said...

Hey Everyone...I appreciate you all stopping by today. Makes my day a lot better!!

js said...

Jim, you almost had me rolling on the floor laughing! I try not to do that too much. So I did laugh out loud, not just in my head.

Thanks for that.

js

Ryan said...

That is hilarious.

HermitJim said...

Hey Ryan...glad you enjoyed it, my man. Thanks for stopping by!