A Friday Way Of Thinking...!

It's Friday and I'm going a little crazy with all that's going on!

I can't tell ya too much about it yet, but after everything settles down some...I'll explain it in more detail!

With my mind wandering all over the place, I figured I would just post a few rambling thoughts so that you could see how screwed up my train of thought is, OK?

Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!

I have kleptomania,
but when it gets bad,
I take something for it.

FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS!
Except that one where you're naked in church.

Sometimes too much to drink isn't enough.

Kinky is using a feather.
Perverted is using the whole chicken.

Heaven is Where:
The Police are British,
The Chefs are Italian,
The Mechanics are German,
The Lovers are French
and
It's all organized by the Swiss.

Hell is Where:
The Police are German,
The Chefs are British,
The Mechanics are French,
The Lovers are Swiss
and
It's all organized by the Italians.

My short-term memory is not as sharp as it used to be.
Also, my short-term memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

Welcome to Utah
Set your watch back 2020years..

In just two days from now,
tomorrow will be yesterday.

A bartender is just a pharmacist
with a limited inventory

The statement below is true.
The statement above is false.

I may be schizophrenic,
but at least I have each other.

I am a Nobody.
Nobody is Perfect.
Therefore I am Perfect.

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

Dyslexics Have More Nuf.


I LOVE COOKING WITH WINE
Sometimes I even put it in the food.

When you work here,
you can name your own salary.
I named mine, "Slim".

Reality is only an illusion
that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.

I like cats too.
Let's exchange recipes.

Red meat is not bad for you
Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.

I am having an out-of-money
experience.

Don't sweat the petty things.
Don't pet the sweaty things.

Corduroy pillows are making headlines!

See? I told ya so...! Maybe some fresh coffee on the patio will help keep my mind on a short leash! Certainly can't hurt...!