Thursday, March 13, 2014

Oxymorons For Thursday...!

Baby Sis sent me this a few days ago and I'm thing that you might enjoy them. OK?

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand On the watch Called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled In the dictionary, How would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, Where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7.. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" Mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" When we are already there?

10. Why are they called " stands" When they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" When it really is "after light"?

12.. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" Make the unexpected expected?

13.. Why are a "wise man" and A "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" Mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" Not spelled The way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, Why do they have to pay you to do it?

17.. If all the world is a stage, Where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, Why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed And have dyslexia, Can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular And panties plural?
(In Australia, you buy a “pair” of bras, just like panties!)

21.. Why do you press harder On the buttons of a remote control When you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags And garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated Is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25.. Why doesn't glue Stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set When you only have one?

27. Christmas - What other time of the year Do you sit in front of a dead tree And eat candy out of your socks?

28. Why do we drive on a parkway And park on a driveway?
I dunno, why do we?

I may have already posted these for ya. If I did, forgive me and enjoy them again anyway! Remember, I'm getting old and feeble minded!

Coffee out on the patio again this morning. Cool, but there will be sunshine!


Mamahen said...

Love these...would also love to sit on your patio 14° with wind chill -1°····winter isn't giving up easily....I think some fresh fruit salad on a sunny patio sounds good today. I'll share :))

Chickenmom said...

Thanks for the chuckle! I'll bring some whipped cream for all that delicious fruit, Mamahen! Very cold and very windy here, too. :o(

linda m said...

I always enjoy reading those sayings. 6 degrees outside here this morning. Sitting on your sunny patio sounds fine to me. Thanks for the fresh fruit salad Mamahen.

Sunnybrook Farm said...

Captain Kirk could defeat the logical alien invader with those, it would simply self destruct halfway through the list. They "don't compute".

JO said...

I have seen some of these before but not all. They still are pretty good and I have asked those questions too. LOL

Nice morning here too, bet that means the winds a comin this afternoon rats. So going to enjoy the morning for sure.

HermitJim said...

Hey Mamahen...
I'm sorry but that's just way too cold for me! However, the fruit salad sure sounds good!

Thanks for coming by today!

Hey Phyllis...
You ladies always make me hungry talking about all this good stuff to eat!

Thanks for coming by to share some sunshine!

Hey Linda M...
I am starting to think that Winter is going to stick around your place for a while!

Thanks for stopping by today!

Hey Sunnybrook...
Some of them certainly don't compute at all!

Thanks for the visit today!

Hey Jo...
Yesterday was really windy here, but so far today, it's very pleasant!

Thanks, sweetie, for coming over this morning!

Dizzy-Dick said...

Thanks for the smile. I can always use a good smile and some of these made me laugh out loud.